Am I ever learning! And crying! And laughing! And loving! And thankful every single day for this new little person in our lives. I am exhausted, but not because I don't have the opportunity to sleep, I have it, right after Carson eats he goes back to sleep at night, but I can't sleep. I'm so tired and I lay in bed and only half sleep. Not the restful kind, the worrisome kind that makes me constantly check on the baby. Then I nestle back into the crook of Kenny's arm and pray to sleep, and it just doesn't happen. Speaking of the crook of Kenny's arm, I haven't been in it for almost 9 months because I was pregnant and had to sleep with a body pillow, which eliminated any change of making it into that crook. But I'm back. And loving it!
I've had some funny funny moments lately. Yesterday I spent the day with Kenny (and I had the baby with me of course). I needed to be out of the house (going STIR CRAZY) working....I basically just put the baby in the stroller and was with him, sitting most of the time while people cooed over how cute the baby is. Then we went out to lunch with one of his coworkers, then to the baby's check-up, and then to Costco. This is when I lost it. I was feeding Carson his bottle in the back of the truck while Kenny went to get a cart. When he came back, Carson had projectile vomitted all over me and I was balling. He momentarily cried, but I wailed. Kenny thought something was wrong with the baby, but it was me that needed comforting. I lost it for a couple of minutes. I just needed a break for a minute. So after Costco, Kenny insisted that I go to the bookstore and get a coffee and read People cover to cover. And I did. I cried the whole way there and after 50 minutes, I felt guilty for being away from my boys and made a mad dash home and cried when I got home because I missed them so much. Then I felt like normal again. FINALLY. Kenny and I got a little bit of alone time then, which I'm really missing right now, and things were better. Whew! I'm starting to get the hang of this! Go to flickr on the sidebar for some new pictures. He is adorable!!
5 comments:
I love your honesty!!! THANK YOU!! Although, I had to read that post outloud to Kevin to forewarn him what was coming soon (hopefully!). ha!
Hi Lindsey, Hope yo udon't mind me reading or commenting on your blog.. I am a friend of RoozGal and she sent me over..
Being a mother is the hardest job you will ever have, but also the most rewarding.. and for awhile you will feel crazy and messed up.. but it is ok...
I remember crying for no reason other than it just felt like I needed to...
But I wish you luck and he is BEAUTIFUL!
GOSH I cannot wait to scoop him up and kiss his cute little head!
Oh, he sure is a cutie.
Worry is something that you won't ever be able to stop doing once you are a mom, but you have to try. You have to sleep to be good to him.
And, taking some time for you will really help.
And, seriously, pregnancy and post-pregnancy hormones are the worst. I would cry just looking at my girls. Not sad tears...just crying.
I remember those days and I know they are coming again. ((hugs)) get some sleep, you need it.
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